Dreams

Last night, I dreamt of my bestfriend who was killed last February 14.

I really loved him and treated him as a real brother.

The dream seemed to last only for seconds. We were on a jeepney, going through this highway. Everything was blurred, but I remember going through a factory of Ritz crackers, which was weird, but then again dreams are weird.

I suddenly saw his face clearly, and he was smiling at me. I forgot what he was saying, but I knew that he was saying goodbye. I knew this because I kept on saying: "Mag-iingat ka, mag-iingat ka..." (You take care, you take care).

I guess it really is time to say goodbye. I was not able to say goodbye to him properly....


On the night of February 14, 2006, Duke and I were supposed to have our yearly date. Every Valentine's day, we try to go out, even if we're not lovers.

We have been through so much together, we were in love once, but that turned into a different kind of love.

I was waiting for him and was wondering why he was not dropping by....minutes turned into hours.

I fell asleep waiting for him.

By morning, my cousin woke me up and told me that my bestfriend had died, with 2 gunshot wounds and 4 stab wounds, after getting into a fight with a long-time nemesis.

I asked my mom to go to the morgue to identify his body. From that point up to the time that he was buried, I didn't have the guts to visit him. I wanted to remember him as what he was in life, and not in death.

I guess he got tired of waiting for me to say goodbye.

I miss you Duke. I'm sorry.